What Freedom Means to Me... and the little ones.

For the English Society Closing Social tonight, we read and judged public school entries for Provo's Freedom Festival Essay Contest, based on the perennial theme of "American Values: Family, Freedom, God, and Country." Which is about as broad as a contest prompt can be. Gotta start synthesis training early, I guess. We had a grand old time eating pizza and looking through the essays to score them. My category of judging was the 4-6 grade level. Here are just a few excerpts from the best of the the best, in all their astute, ambiguous, didactic, and totally "wha--?" glory...

"How cool is it that I can say my grandfather is one of the people who gave me my freedom. Proud. That is what everyone I know says. We are proud to be Americans."

"About 200 years ago, many African-Americans were slaves. They all went through tough times by being punished for not doing their job, not listening to their masters, reading and writing, the possibilities are endless."

"Policemen guard the roads, stop people from speeding, stop thieves, and protect us. Doctors heal us, help us, save us, and help us survive. America is the best place I could ever dream of living."

"If you're upset with your family, don't be. They are the only family you've got. Love and care for them. They're the best."

"My country is so cool. We are free, smart, and much more. We were the first ones to the moon, we invented tons of things and we can be so proud of so many things we do."

"We have medicine for pets and other objects."

"There are so many things that need an explanation that science won't suffice for. God is that explanation."

"The Constitution gives us rights... No other country can say that and really mean it."

"America is a land of values. We value many things that mixed with other personal values, can brighten a life. Many countries do not possess these values, such as East Germany, parts of China, and other countries around the world."

"America is the greatest place in the history of the world."

"Peace comes from minding your own business."


Ain't that great? My favorite is the third from last. I'm guessing this contestant used a pre-1989 encyclopedia to conduct his research. But anyways. Ya. America is great. Even though I am getting incredibly antsy to see beyond its borders, I'm grateful for my freedom. My freedom which allows me to go to school, and study Shakespeare, and write papers for my Shakespeare teacher, 10-page papers which have deadlines, one of which is due Monday and not started, which I must attend to now. Hasta!

This is NOT a joke...

But it did make me laugh out loud at the supermarket.

Upon listening to my phone messages after being in class, message two is from my dear mom:

"Hey sweetie, you need to change your message ...And I got an interesting piece of mail in our mailbox today for you. It's from some place in American Fork called the 'Center for Advanced Reproductive Medicine.' It says 'We look forward to helping you achieve your goal of pregnancy.' And I just wanted to find out- um- if they mailed it to the wrong Emily K. Go-------... or if you are in fact, trying to reproduce on your own. I'd be very interested and curious to see. Give your mom a call back and let me know the big news..."

You know, it's flattering to get a stamped, snail-mail letter addressed directly to you in this day and age, but it's even more flattering when its contents reveal the yellow brick road to your subconcious desires-- what you didn't even know you wanted!

Maybe this company is partnering up with BYU... a preemptive strategy to add on that final layer of pressure-- "Oh, you're not wanting to have children? Our bad... it's just that, well, all your friends are doing it, we must have gotten their names mixed up with yours... same demographic brackets, ya know?" Ya.

Suffice it to say, the message had me suppressing guffaws for days. And if the original letter wasn't thrown away, I would scrapbook it.

Rodents, etc.

The Olympics are over. All good things must come to an end, but I really think that Canada started something during the Closing Ceremonies that other generations of Olympiads are going to be hard pressed to forget. Namely, I mean the HUGE blow-up animals that came out during the song. More specifically, the Beavers.



Just check those babies out. If you're wondering whether or not we've gone too far in anthropomorphizing animals, the answer is-- well, yes. As long as those come-hither red-tinted eyes aren't a result of the Twilight pandemic (Even the rodents want a bit of Edward with their cheese, it seems)--we should all be fine, right?

Meanwhile, meese float above the ground, grinning. I surmise they are either 1: daydreaming that they have been chosen to replace Santa's reindeer, or 2: Fondly remembering the Bambi days of innocence and forest yore. We can only hope their tails are up in a unified gesture of peace.

You just gotta give credit to the minds behind these guys to make these balloons so fantastic on so many different levels. That's gumption right there, folks.

P.S. If you can't get enough of great rodents, check this out.